Caster Semenya, 18, a South African female runner, won the 800 meters race at this week’s world championships, prompting the IAAF (International Association of Athletics Federation) to ask for a gender test.
Oh, Witty Digz, you dick (no pun intended). Don’t you see they just want to know how many types of steroids are in her system?
Hmmm. Not according to this gem of a quote:
IAAF spokesman Nick Davies stressed that "it's a medical issue, not an issue of cheating."
Which can also be read:
"We just want to be absolutely sure that there’s no dick."
So congratulations Caster, all of your hard work is about to pay off with the most embarrassing month of your life. Why do I say a month? According to the IAAF, the test is “extremely complex” with “very long reports.”
Wait, here’s an idea. Pull down her fucking pants! Is there a dick? Is she packin’ heat? Can you tell the time by how the sun’s shadow hits the ground off of her penis?? NO? She’s a chick!
However, if a cock unfurls and thumps to the ground … oorrrr, saayyyy, two African nuts are taped between her butt cheeks, well, then I guess she is a god damn man.
How much are you paying for all of these tests? I can send you my address. Pay me half and I’ll grab her shorts with BBQ tongs and rip ‘em down.
By the way, “International Association of Athletics Federation”??? Do you really need to be an Association AND a Federation? Fuck off. Who’s running this circus?
P.S. I bet she has a dick!
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